I Refuse To Let Common Sense Cloud My Judgment

...so reads the postcard that Mrs. Spalding sent to me! I LOVE IT :)

So long, and thanks for all the fish!

Tambamboozlepatootinrootinroozle!

Happy Birthday To You!
Happy Birthday To You!

Happy Birthday Dear Tambamboozlepatootinrootinroozle,

Happy Birthday To You!



P.S. Hpoe yuo cuold raed teh crad I mialed ot yuo ;)

TOWANDA! Or, Mill Avenue Inspires Memories of Evelyn Couch

THE SCENE: Evelyn is cut off in a parking lot

Evelyn Couch: Hey! I was waiting for that spot!
Girl #1: Face it, lady, we're younger and faster!

THE ACTION: Evelyn rear-ends the other car six times

Girl #1: What the hell are you doing?
Girl #2: Are you fucking crazy?

Evelyn Couch: Face it, girls, I'm older and I have more insurance.

The Waste Land

My nerves are bad tonight. Yes, bad. Stay with me.
Speak to me. Why do you never speak? Speak.
What are you thinking of? What thinking? What?
I never know what you are thinking. Think.

Who Threw a Handle?

Don't any of you even entertain a single thought about going as "The Landlady" for Halloween this year. She's MINE!!!

I'm the Lyrical Jesse James

Challenge:
Band? Song Title?

Rule:
No internet cheating. Rub those two remaining brain cells together and let me know who sang it and the title of the song without the aid of the world wide web. Good luck!

Prize:
You'll have the power.


Bye now.

I'm Just Sitting in My Car and Waiting for Serj Tankian

"You know that every time I try to go where I really want to be, it’s already where I am, cause I’m already there."

(SUGAR!!!)

~~~

"I think you do what you’re destined to do," says Tankian, expressing what could serve as his band’s credo. "If you follow your heart and you follow your path, then you’ll always be safe with anything that you do..."


P.S. Look out, MJK.

The Party of the First Part

According to our contract, at precisely midnight, at the moment of her greatest triumph, the party of the first part, that's you, agrees to render up her soul now and forever more to the party of the second part, that's me. Shall we go?

Chasing Rabbits

"Who am I, then? Tell me that first, and then, if I like being that person, I'll come up; if not, I'll stay down here till I'm somebody else."

Slinkies

Some people are like Slinkies...

Not really good for anything, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs.

Shout Out!

To my peeps Vicki and Adam, who gave me the coolest belated birthday gift EVER!! You guys rock my world. Thanks.

BHTM

Saturday afternoon I went to the McDowell Mountain Music Festival to see Big Head Todd & The Monsters. As if that weren't cool enough, I actually got to meet most of the band (Todd and Brian anyway) and have photos taken! Now if only I weren’t so technologically feeble, I might be able to post said pictures for all of your viewing! If you really want to see them, leave a comment and I’ll share the link to my Ofoto page. It was all very exciting.

When they left the stage, Vicki and I decided to head to the trailer area toward the back. We talked to a guy named Scott that turned out to be best friends with Brian Nevin (drummer). He walked off with the promise to “see what he could do”…so we waited a few minutes at the fence. Then we noticed a gaping hole in the fence! So we just waltzed in there like we owned the place and around the corner in the dining tent, we found Scott and Brian! After a few photos were snapped, Vicki asked Brian for an autograph. He said no problem and headed back toward the trailer to get something to write with (we were quite the prepared fans, I can tell you). But THEN, THEN, we saw Todd Mohr coming out of the trailer! So we ran over and some nice guy took photos of both of us with them! And Todd is every bit as cute up close as he is on the stage. GRRRR!

TTFN

I've decided I like reading blogs a lot more than I like writing them. You may have already guessed as much due to lack of posting. Plus, I feel weird blogging from work, and to this day I have no PC at home.

So, much love to all two of you readers and ta-ta for now.

Peace.

Freaking Idiots! Gosh.

This morning on my way into work, while still in the parking lot of the complex, I turned the corner and a woman backed right out in front of me from her parking spot. As if that weren’t bad enough, she stopped right there and proceeded to make a call on her cell phone! So, being the ever-patient person that I am, I waited about 2.5 seconds and then leaned into the horn with everything I had. That woke her up.

The Roach

A few times over the course of the last year, I have encountered a gigantic cockroach in my bathroom (don’t EVEN tell me where there is one, there are many…I just don’t want to hear it). Anyway, I got a big can of spray poison to have at-the-ready the next time the bastard showed his ugly face. Turns out that appearance was made last night. Without hesitation, I grabbed that can and ripped the lid off and started spraying like a mad woman. But he would.not.die! As he scurried to safety (or what he thought was safety), I followed his course with more of the toxic spray. From the sink to the floor to the shower curtain to the cabinet and finally the doorway. This is where things started to get ugly, and near the point where I actually started to cry. It flipped on its back and flailed around miserably for an eternity. It was like a train wreck in that while I wanted to look away, I couldn’t. Then I started to choke on the fumes of the spray and thought to myself “I hope this isn’t how the poor cockroach feels! Does the spray just cut off THEIR air supply?” People, I actually CRIED over the writhing death of a cockroach! When I could take it not one moment longer, I got the biggest handful of toilet paper I could hold, grabbed him, and flushed him away.

I honestly think I am scarred for life.

P.S. Thanks to Alwan for answering the phone and calming me down after it happened.

Sugar Curt Rahe

"If a maid costs that much money, I better be getting some ass out of the deal!"

It's A Good Thing

Anybody else wonder how Martha managed to keep those blonde highlights up while she was on the inside? I don't see any tell-tale roots in any of the photos I've seen and she was in there for five months! Maybe it really was Camp Cupcake after all.

Lucky!

Apparently I’m doing a stellar job of taking over blogdom for webwonky! Sorry for the sporadic posts…I guess it is high time I got a computer at home since I don’t always have the opportunity to post from work. Too busy brewing all of that coffee…

What is everybody doing this weekend? I think I might go to a spring training game with the ghetto boys on Saturday. Pre-party at Uncle Sanford’s* (assuming of course that he’s able to unload his storage auction finds at the Ghetto Garage Sale). I might even take some of my junk over there to add to the mix. Think anyone will pay me full price for my now over-sized Lucky jeans? Which brings me to my hot tip of the day: Don’t spend your hard-earned cash on the jeans you love when you’re shedding the pounds. Major waste of money! I now have four sizes in the closet that I can’t wear anymore. *sigh*

*this new moniker courtesy of Uncle Sanford’s little brother

Long-Haired Hippies and the Antichrist

I have no idea why the clerk at Fry's Electronics was looking at me sideways when I handed her my purchases the other day. I, for one, think The Essential Willie Nelson and Marilyn Manson go together quite nicely.